“My spouse says they’ll never give me a divorce.” It’s one of the most common things a family lawyer hears, and it can make people feel stuck. Here’s the good news: in Texas, your spouse doesn’t get a veto. You can get divorced even if your spouse refuses to agree, refuses to sign, or refuses to show up. What your spouse can do is make the process slower and more expensive by contesting the details. This article explains how that plays out.
Texas doesn’t require your spouse’s consent
Most Texas divorces are granted on the no-fault ground of insupportability. That means the marriage has become insupportable because of discord or conflict that has destroyed the legitimate ends of the marriage relationship, and there’s no reasonable expectation of reconciliation.
Your spouse can say they still love you, that the marriage can be saved, or that they don’t believe in divorce. Those feelings are real, but they don’t defeat a divorce based on insupportability. If one spouse is convinced the marriage is over, that is usually enough. A judge does have the power, in some cases, to order the spouses to counseling while the case is pending, which can add some time, but it doesn’t give either spouse the right to block the divorce.
Step one: file the petition
You start the case by filing an Original Petition for Divorce in a county where you or your spouse has lived for the past 90 days (with six months of Texas residency). In Guadalupe County, that’s filed with the Guadalupe County District Clerk. The 60-day waiting period starts on the filing date, whether your spouse cooperates or not. See how to file for divorce in Seguin for the full process.
Step two: serve your spouse
A cooperative spouse can sign a waiver of service. A spouse who refuses to agree to the divorce usually won’t sign anything, so you’ll need formal service:
- Personal service. A constable, sheriff or private process server delivers the citation and petition to your spouse in person and files proof with the court. Your spouse doesn’t have to accept or sign for the papers for service to count.
- Alternative service. If your spouse is dodging the process server, you can ask the court to approve another method, such as leaving the papers with someone at the home or, in some cases, serving electronically. The request has to be supported by a sworn statement describing the attempts to serve.
- Service by publication. If you truly can’t locate your spouse after a diligent search, the court may allow notice by publication. This method has limits: it can be enough to grant the divorce, but the court may not be able to make certain orders, like money judgments, against a spouse who was never personally served.
Refusing to open the door or tearing up the papers doesn’t stop the case. Once service is properly completed and filed, the clock for your spouse to respond starts running.
If your spouse ignores the case: default
After service, your spouse generally has until 10:00 a.m. on the Monday after 20 days have passed to file a written answer. If they don’t, and the proof of service has been on file with the court for the required time, you may be able to finish the divorce by default.
A default doesn’t mean you automatically get everything you asked for. You still appear at a short hearing (a prove-up), testify to the facts, and present a proposed decree. The judge must find that the property division is just and right and that any orders about the children are in their best interest. Asking for something unreasonable can backfire and give your spouse grounds to challenge the judgment later.
Extra protections apply if your spouse is on active military duty. Read more in default divorce in Texas.
If your spouse fights the case: a contested divorce
A spouse who doesn’t want the divorce may hire a lawyer and contest everything. They can’t stop the divorce, but they can disagree about:
- How community property and debts are divided
- Whether property is community or separate
- Custody, the possession schedule and child support
- Spousal maintenance
- Attorney’s fees
Contested cases follow a longer path: temporary orders, discovery, usually mediation, and if necessary a trial. Many spouses who start out saying “never” come to accept the divorce once the case is moving, and the case settles at mediation. Learn more about mediation in a Guadalupe County divorce.
Common delay tactics, and how courts handle them
- Avoiding service. Courts can authorize alternative service when there’s proof of diligent attempts.
- Ignoring discovery. Courts can compel responses and impose sanctions for failing to cooperate.
- Repeatedly changing lawyers or requesting continuances. Judges have discretion to deny delays that aren’t justified.
- Refusing to sign the decree after agreeing. A properly executed mediated settlement agreement is generally binding, and the court can enter judgment on it.
When your spouse lives in another state or country
If you meet the Texas residency requirements, you can generally get divorced here even if your spouse lives elsewhere. However, a Texas court may need personal jurisdiction over your spouse to divide certain property or order support, and special rules decide which state can make custody orders. This is an area where legal advice before filing can save a lot of time.
Protecting yourself while the case is pending
A spouse who is angry about the divorce may act out. Consider:
- Asking for temporary orders covering the house, bills, children and support
- Copying financial records and keeping them somewhere safe
- Communicating in writing and keeping messages civil
- Seeking a protective order if there’s violence or threats
Frequently asked questions
Can my spouse refuse to sign the divorce papers?
They can refuse, but it won’t stop the divorce. You can have them served, and if they don’t answer, you may be able to finish the case by default.
How long does it take if my spouse won’t cooperate?
If they ignore the case, a default divorce can often be finished not long after the 60-day waiting period. If they actively contest it, the case may take many months.
What if I don’t know where my spouse is?
After a diligent search, the court may allow service by publication. The divorce can still be granted, though some types of relief may be limited.
Can a judge refuse to grant my divorce because my spouse objects?
Not simply because of an objection. If the evidence shows the marriage is insupportable, the court can grant the divorce, though a judge may order counseling in some cases first.
Have questions about your situation? Talk with a Seguin divorce lawyer. Consultations are free, by phone or in person, in English or Spanish.
Related guides
This article is general information about Texas law, not legal advice for your situation. Laws change, and every case is different.